If you don't want to be greeted with paws and swinging tails,
Don't come inside, because DOGS LIVE HERE.

If you don't like the feel of a cold nose or wet tongue,
Don't come inside, because DOGS LIVE HERE.

If you don't want to step over scattered toys,
Don't come inside, because DOGS LIVE HERE.

If you think a home ought to smell of perfume,
Don't come inside, because DOGS LIVE HERE.

But if you don't mind all of this,
You will be instantly loved when you do come inside,
Because DOGS LIVE HERE.